Ben is our 4th child, and he is so snuggly. He loves to snuggle, but when he is not snuggling, and especially when he is quiet for even 30 seconds, you can be sure that he is thinking up some sort of science experiment that will make mommy's brain hurt. He doesn't know "down time". He doesn't particularly like TV (not a bad thing), and he loves his TRUCKS! He pronounces his "T" with a "Frrr" sound, which is a little socially unacceptable, since his favorite word for the past year has been "Truck". Most people get it, but occasionally we turn a head of a sweet little old lady at the grocery store, as we pass by a toy truck that Ben wants so badly, and screams the word all the way through the aisle "FRRRUCK!!!". He has a face that makes little old ladies even love, so we usually win them over, even with our bad manners and unintended profanity! Anyway, a few moments ago, as I was enjoying a nice lazy morning watching cartoons (and working on my laptop) from my bedroom, Ben wheeled in his giant yellow dump "frrruck" full of red kool-aid! YIKES! He found a small packet of powder in the pantry, filled his dump truck with water, added the powder, stirred it up with a spatula, then went cruising around the house. Now this is a normal tonka dump truck, and is not at all water proof, so I now have little dribbles of red kool-aid that have fallen through the cracks in the truck all over my house. Thank goodness, we only have one room with carpet downstairs, and he thankfully did not try to drag the truck up the stairs.
This morning, I am suffering from allergies and sports activity overload, and I decided that our preschooler could play hookie so that we could have a break from the constant running. Sometimes preschool is a break, but sometimes, the racing to get them ready, out the door, lunches made, then racing to pick up 3 hours later is more effort than the 2.5 hour break is worth. We declared today a "jammie... play all day day" for the 2 little guys, and have been lazing around since the 3rd graders were out the door at 7:30. We have not slept, but have not done anything of note today. I fed them breakfast, and we have been on no particular schedule since. Ben helped himself to some coffee cake in the kitchen, and crumbs are in many unknown places in our house. I scolded him for the mess, so being the helper that he is, he then got the dustbuster vaccum and cleaned up crumbs and who knows what else until the battery ran out. It was a few minutes later that he decided to mix up a beverage in his truck.
Why? I have learned that this question is futile with my little Ben! It is so difficult to get mad at him though, because he is Mr. Happy, and usually he is so proud of his accomplishment. This kool-aid in the dump truck is the type of thing that happens regularly here. Anything unpredictable, that you would not in your wildest dreams think of is what Ben dreams up.
Case 1:He has recently poured an entire bottle of Hershey syrup on our white lab puppy, then lime juice, then hand sanitizer. He was having so much fun! He was sooo... sorry, and happy to help with bathing the puppy, where he turned the hose on anyone who came near, then turned the water to the swimming pool on without my knowledge, and it ran for 2 days, flooding our entire yard.
Case 2: A couple of months ago, I was making my final walk through the house before we departed for our day of school and activities, and I noticed a piece of paper under a chair... it was the wrapper for a stick of butter. I said "hmmm..." and asked Ben if he had gotten into the butter. He walked right over to his tub of legos and pulled out a stick of butter. Again... it is futile to ask "Why?". I don't know if he will be some brilliant engineer of sorts or a master criminal, but for now, he is still my baby.
He makes me so tired, but he is so sweet... it is still worth every moment. He really isn't trying to cause me grief, and is always happy to help with the clean up. The truth is, I blame myself a bit for leaving him alone to find these adventures, but I sometimes just need to sit down (and usually, I pay for sitting)! Some say that I should discipline more. I guess that is probably so, but getting worked up about these things that happen at least 99 times a day would cause me to have a coronary. I try to save the discipline for the moments when they are intentionally being mean or defiant, and try to lay low for the innocent messes. Maybe my life would be easier if I were more strict, but I leave that for their dad, who is ultra strict, and could never sit still for a lazy day like today anyway.
My mother was (and is) the most organized, high energy, and the neatest, most proper woman on this earth, and she would be horrified at the lazy morning we are having, amidst the million things I should be doing today. We were never allowed to have food around the house. We also never did crafty things that would cause a mess because that just was not my mom. We didn't carve pumpkins, or eat a lot of watermelon (unless it was cut into tiny cubes or outside), or fingerpaint, or make jewelry... all of these things would have sent my mom over the edge. Her house is always perfect, and though I am sure there were messy days, they are so few that these are not at all in my mental picture of our house. I remember Thatcher melted crayons on the playroom floor, and that was monumental. She is 63, and gets more done than most 30 year olds in a day. She is now in a place where she can afford the help, and she does hire people to help with her house work and yard work, but she works alongside them. She still does not sit down. I normally don't sit down either, but I often think I don't have a choice. With this army I live with, sitting down would allow the troops to overtake me (Kool-aid, for instance), and I might never regain control. That is how I see it anyway. I guess I get a little of that from her, but sometimes I have to let go and release, and today is one of those days. I take a deep breath, clean up what I can, and make a note to have the carpets cleaned soon.
Something that gets me through my days is a sobering thought of 2 people I care about who have had to experience the most unfair type of tragedy a parent can imagine in the past year. In October, my step brother lost his 19 year old son in a car accident, when he fell asleep in the morning on his way to college after staying up all night to study. In February (on Valentines Day), my sweet ex-sister in law lost a 6 month old baby, who died in her sleep, and though not confirmed, it was likely caused by SIDS. I cannot imagine the pain that these wonderful parents will experience throughout their lives, but it is sobering to remember this inconceivable pain when I get frustrated with the little inconveniences in my world. These memories keep me grounded, as I know the parents who have lost would give anything for these moments that we take for granted. I pray that I never forget the true gift that I have in these little stinkers! Someday I know we will be longing for dump trucks full of kool-aid or butter in our legos. These days will be gone before we know it!
I have determined not to get worked up about the messes today, but I do have to keep it manageable, or I will break my deal with myself. Ben is now snuggling again, for the moment.
Remember Marshmallow puppy? She is 6 months old now, and 42 pounds! She weighs more than our two little boys, and almost as much as her “mommy”, Maggie. Maggie is a tiny 9 yr old and Marshmallow pulls her on their walks. Maggie loves this puppy though, and is already plotting puppies for Marshmallow....
NO! We ma
y be crazy b
ut we do have our limits. We are not venturing to puppies in this crazy family. We do love this sweet puppy though. She has quickly become a member of our family. 
As my new brother in law so kindly put it on a recent visit... "this is the perfect dog for this family". He said this as 2 of our wild boys were trying to give Marshmallow her first swimming lesson in our pool. Anthony was trying to pull her and Alexander trying to push her into the pool, and Marshmallow was running circles, grabbing everyone's shoes, drinks, clothing, along the way. She does add to our circus, but she is perfect for us.
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